From the Mixed-up files of Mr. Will Riley

There is a girl named Sue. She is sitting at a table with four piles of drawings in front of her: drawings of me, drawings of her, drawings of her teacher, and drawings of her best friend. She wants to tear one of the pictures. I come in and say "Tear a 'me', Sue."

There is a bunch of bodily fluid from the center of a thing. There are several special interest groups sitting around a table bargaining with this bodily-fluid-from-the-center-of-something. They all want this thing to join their group and embody their group. One of the groups says, "Hey. Be us, core puss."

A scientific survey is performed to see which profession produces the most poop. The scientists look at a mill, a jewelry factory, a real estate office, and an auto dealership. They record their results by going into the bathroom of the place and taking all the crap from the toilet. They then put it into a measuring cup without measurements. Since there are no measurements, the scientists just have to report to the boss which poop fills the cup the most. After extensive research, they go back to the boss and say, "Mill turds fill more."

A guy named frank once asked a girl named lynn what she'd been doing. She had been playing her guitar. Lynn's answer to Frank's question is written as follows in history textbooks:
"Been jammin' Frank."
-Lynn

My mom wants new grass in her backyard. It is a very well-known fact. Everyone knows she wants new grass, but no one knows her name. On Who Wants to be a Millionaire, there was a question that went like this:
Seine wants ______
The contestant responded
"Sod. Um, who's Seine?"